Humble pie.

Humble pie. Every had some? It's bitter. And sweet. 

Sometimes we walk around like we own the place. Our confidence is pretty high, we're feeling pretty good. And BOOM. We are knocked off our high horse and reminded of how human we really are.

Ouch - it hurts. Sometimes physically, but mostly it hurts our pride.  And sometimes it can even break your heart.

This morning I was taking cards out to the mailbox. The sprinklers had been left on. And the temp this morning was a whopping 14 degrees. So the sidewalk was ice.

Yep. I fell. Flat on my back. Luckily with no one around... but thank goodness I didn't pass out or was seriously hurt, because I would have laid there alone for who knows how long.

I got up and picked up all the mail that went flying - and granny walked to the mailbox and back- through the crispy frozen grass :)

I'm a little sore. But I'm alive and well.

I believe things like this happen to the best of us - physically falling as well as stumbling and making mistakes.  Finding out things that take your breath away.  Hearing gossip about another - or about yourself- true or not.

These things happen- not because God doesn't care. He DOES care - even about my dumb little fall.

He cares about our mistakes and our shortcomings and our guilt and our shame and He cares when we are mistreated. But most of all- He cares about our hearts.

Our response to these hits are what really matters. 

Choose to be humble? Choose to grow?  Choose to check our hearts and change for the better?  Become a little more like our Daddy God?

Or not. It's a choice.

And I believe He allows things - people even- to be present in our life to keep us on our toes and on our knees.

To keep us humble. 

To keep us dependent.

I believe that God DOES give us more than we can handle.  So that we are unable to do this thing called life on our own.  To make us realize we are really and truly in need of a Saviour.

So I'm just gonna keep on eating my humble pie.

Because if it keeps me close to Him and makes me look a little more like Him- it's worth it. 

Much love friends,
Christa

The most beautiful girl in the world

Well, unless you were lucky enough to miss it- you probably heard / saw / read about a certain female choice to bare her body to the world recently. 

This is nothing new. You can find nude pictures anywhere. Nothing is sacred to people anymore. 

My heart has been so heavy- for the young women that will look at things like this and buy into the lie that they have to be a certain way- look or act a certain way- or they just aren't "enough." 

I fell into this trap- for all of my teenage years and some of my adult years. Thinking I had to perform for love. Pretend and copy and compare. 

Comparison really is the theif of joy. And it will eat away at your soul. 

There is one that looks at you and to Him there is absolutely no comparison. 

He gave his life for you

He fought for you 

He bled for you 

He prays for you 

He sings bad rejoices over you 

He numbers the hairs on your head 

He sees you 

He counts your tears 

He hears your every word 

Don't sell yourself short. You aren't cheap or easy. You are fearfully and wonderfully made and there is only one you. And your heart is worth being guarded. 

You are not your body or hair or clothing. You are more. You are precious. 

And let me tell you something... 

You are the most beautiful girl in the world- yes you- and don't you forget it. 

❤️Christa 

Who told you that you were naked?

Genesis 3 The Message (MSG)

3 The serpent was clever, more clever than any wild animal God had made. He spoke to the Woman: “Do I understand that God told you not to eat from any tree in the garden?”

2-3 The Woman said to the serpent, “Not at all. We can eat from the trees in the garden. It’s only about the tree in the middle of the garden that God said, ‘Don’t eat from it; don’t even touch it or you’ll die.’”

4-5 The serpent told the Woman, “You won’t die. God knows that the moment you eat from that tree, you’ll see what’s really going on. You’ll be just like God, knowing everything, ranging all the way from good to evil.”

6 When the Woman saw that the tree looked like good eating and realized what she would get out of it—she’d know everything!—she took and ate the fruit and then gave some to her husband, and he ate.

7 Immediately the two of them did “see what’s really going on”—saw themselves naked! They sewed fig leaves together as makeshift clothes for themselves.

8 When they heard the sound of God strolling in the garden in the evening breeze, the Man and his Wife hid in the trees of the garden, hid from God.

9 God called to the Man: “Where are you?”

10 He said, “I heard you in the garden and I was afraid because I was naked. And I hid.”

11 God said, “Who told you you were naked? Did you eat from that tree I told you not to eat from?”

12 The Man said, “The Woman you gave me as a companion, she gave me fruit from the tree, and, yes, I ate it.”

God said to the Woman, “What is this that you’ve done?”

13 “The serpent seduced me,” she said, “and I ate.”

God has been doing such a work in my heart.  

I can honestly say that I am not the same person I was a year ago.  I have an app on my phone called "time hop". It brings up Facebook statuses and Instagram pictures from a year ago or more, and it is such an amazing reminder of the changes my family and I have experienced. 

When I was first diagnosed with cancer, I had such resolve.  I felt so brave and I felt the strength to endure.  I said - no matter what it looks like, Jesus - I am yours. I will follow and serve you and I will be honored to go through the fire for you.  I won't turn my back. Hair or no hair. Sick or not. Healed or not. 

No matter what it looks like- oh what determination I felt.  

Don't get me wrong here.  I am not saying I lost my faith in the process. Actually- my faith is stronger than it has ever been.  

The fact is - everyone wants faith. And everyone wants to live by faith...until they HAVE to.  Until there is no choice. 

There are things about myself I didn't realize.  Oh I knew I grew up with extremely low self confidence. 

Not wanting to put my hair up because I thought my ears were hideous. 

Thinking I was such an ugly duckling. 

Let me just say- No one actually told me this. I just believed it. 

As a young girl and teenager I believed this about myself - and then I grew up.  I became a mother and wife and I met Jesus.  And I thought He healed all of those things. 

And then chemo took my hair. And my eyelashes. And my eyebrows. 

As women - we don't realize how much we rely on these things - to define us. To make us feminine. I sure didn't.  

Who told me that I was naked? 

Who told me I was ugly again? 

Who told me I needed these accessories to make me beautiful?  What defines beautiful? 

beautiful - 1. having beauty; possessing qualities that give great pleasure or satisfaction to see, hear, think about, etc.; delighting the senses or mind. 2. excellent of its kind.

Oh but this isn't what I felt about myself. I surely didn't line up with all of the magazine covers. Or the supermoms. Or the unrealistic expectations of women in the world today.
I barely had the strength to slap my fake eyelashes on. I wanted to be beautiful. But I fell so short in my heart and mind.

Why would I choose to believe this again? 

In my time of being sick - my defenses being down - I believed the lie once again.  I looked at myself and told myself- you are naked. I agreed with that serpent and ate and found myself saying - you are right about me- and I am once again not enough. 

So many of us choose this belief- that we are not beautiful. We forget that our Father is the ultimate artist. That He doesn't make mistakes. That we are fearfully and wonderfully made.

And that we are not our bodies. We are spirit.  

We are not our hair. Or our eyelashes. Or our eyebrows. 

Am I glad my hair is growing back? Sure. It is a comfort and a part of me. It allows me to feel normal. 

But I realize more than I ever have- I am not my hair, or makeup. I am not my clothing. I am spirit. 

And I AM enough because of the One that gave His life for me. 

Be encouraged today friends. You are beautiful. And you are loved.

Choose to believe what He says about you - and not the lies. 

<3 Christa 

I want to look like love.

I realize that most of my blog posts lately have had the same running theme.

Don't take life for granted.

But I just can't get off of that.  It's my heart.  So here's another one. :)

I believe we have been given gifts in the ones God has trusted us with.  Our families, our friends, our relationships.  And I also believe we will be held accountable for the way we have loved them.

I believe we have been given two charges from the almighty.  To love God with everything we have, and to love others BIG.

I have been convicted lately that I haven't loved people well.  Not as well as I should.  Not with my whole heart.  I want to be better at that. I want to look like love.

Starting with my immediate family.  And spreading out from there.

Don't we take the ones closest to us for granted.... the most?  Ugh I hate to admit that. But it's true.  We get familiar with those we are around all the time.

But what gifts they are to us.

I yelled at my kids today.  I got aggravated with my husband too.  And that's ok - we are human and it's gonna happen.  But my heart needed a check. And I'm just so thankful for Holy Spirit. He leads and directs me and my heart into all truth. And boy do I need it.

"She carefully gathers the minutes of her life and lives them."

I want to be this.  I want to cherish every moment - soak up the moments - and really live them.

I cried at dinner tonight. I cried over my barbeque chicken. Why? Because my little boy was shoving food in his mouth and I was tempted to fuss at him. I almost did - and then it hit me.

He is a beautiful gift.  A gift from Daddy God.  And He gives such good gifts!

Love the ones you're with, friends.  They are treasures.  <3


Much love,
Christa

Life more abundant

John 10:10

Jesus told this simple story, but they had no idea what he was talking about. So he tried again. “I’ll be explicit, then. I am the Gate for the sheep. All those others are up to no good—sheep stealers, every one of them. But the sheep didn’t listen to them. I am the Gate. Anyone who goes through me will be cared for—will freely go in and out, and find pasture. A thief is only there to steal and kill and destroy. I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of. (MSG version)

10 The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. (KJV)

Oh friends.  Let me just say that this has been a tough season.  I'm not whining. Okay maybe I am. Just a little.  ;)

Jesus said in the same text that the enemy comes to destroy.  Not only to steal. Not only to kill. But to steal - kill - and destroy.  He does NOT want us to have life. And he definitely doesn't want us to have life better than our dreams, life more abundant.  

So many are hurting, going through terrible things, suffering.  We are not alone in our pain. But we MUST remember - he has come for the purpose of giving us life with Him - and that means life more abundant.  

If you do not feel that you are living an abundant life- I encourage you to find Him again. Take some time for yourself. In your car, in your room, in your closet, it doesn't matter.  Open His word and ask Him to speak to you.  He has life beyond our best dreams for ourselves.  We just need to hand all of the pieces over to Him.  

Don't settle for 9-5, routine, mundane life....for figuring out things on your own.  Don't settle for pill popping just to get through another day.  Don't settle for numbing from tough things.  Don't settle for letting it be this way. 

Go to the well - to the life giver - and let Him refill you and refuel you.  
I'll meet you there :) 

Don't settle. <3 

Much love,
Christa 

Smile.

Smile though your heart is aching

Smile even though it's breaking

When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by

If you smile through your fear and sorrow

Smile and maybe tomorrow

You'll see the sun come shining through for you

Light up your face with gladness

Hide every trace of sadness

Although a tear may be ever so near

That's the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what's the use of crying? 

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile

That's the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what's the use of crying? 

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile

(Smile lyrics, Nat King Cole) 

Something I have heard a lot lately is, "you always smile." 

I have tried to make sense of my season. I have tried to still be myself through the tough times. When I felt like staying in bed, I made myself get up and get dressed. There were times the cancer and meds crippled me and I was in tears, unable to go places and events. Missing my kids activities and breaking my heart. 

Smiling is a choice. Joy is a choice. Love is a choice. 

I have put on a happy face and smiled through the tears. Put a scarf or hat on my bald head and a bit of makeup on my pale face. Because what is the alternative? To stay in bed? To give in to the oppression? To let the darkness into my heart? 

No. 

We must choose love and light, choose it every day. Every moment. 

Not because we feel like it. Joy is not a feeling. 

Because He chose us. 

When we didn't choose Him. 

So I choose joy. When I don't feel it. When I'm hurting. Because it's all in our mind. That's where the battlefield is. 

I'm no hero. I have no supernatural abilities apart from Jesus. I simply try to be what He wants. I stumble every day and am thankful for grace and mercy. 

And I choose joy. I choose to smile. 

 "Be surprised by joy, be surprised by the little flower that shows its beauty in the midst of a barren desert." Henri Nouwen 

-Christa 

Choices

Just sharing what's on my heart today :)


We wake up every day with choices.

To get up early. Or even on time. Or to just sleep in a few more minutes.

To choose what we want for breakfast. Or if we even want to eat. Coffee? Tea? Juice?
Lots of choices.

Some we can make easily. And some take time.  

And some choices we really take our time on, because they have a cost to them.

When I have a choice to make, and I feel like it's a pretty big deal, I know I need to slow down, pray and ask for direction.

Sometimes God is silent, and He lets me go the way I decide.  

When I met my husband, I was hurting.  There had been a breakup after a 2 year relationship, and I was afraid to get into another one.  I determined that I would not get serious with anyone for a long time.

But prom was coming, and I had no date.  So my friend did what she thought was a great idea- and thank goodness she did.  She set me up with her boyfriend's handsome marine friend - and the rest is history.  Today is his birthday - oh I'm so glad he was born. :)

I could have made the choice to stay home for prom - and not agreed to her plan.

I did NOT pray- I didn't even know Jesus or care about being in line with Him or His plan.  But He knew me - and even though lots of bumps were ahead for us - He knew what we would become and He knew His plans.

When we moved to Texas- the plan was not clear - in fact it was very foggy and the only sure thing He put into our hearts was, "Serve and lift the arms of Gary and Carolyn..."  

So we prayed. And we counted the cost. And we cried many tears.  And we said goodbye.

We made the choice to sell our home and move across the country to follow what we felt God was saying for us.  It has not been easy.  It has not been clear.  But it has been full of joy.

Sometimes He confirms we are right where we are supposed to be. And sometimes He is quiet.  And the quiet times are hard.

You also have the power to choose your emotions. Anger, disappointment, peace, sadness, joy.  To choose to love. To choose to hope.

Someone hurts us- on purpose or not- we can choose.
Something doesn't go the way we had hoped- we can choose.
Things end and you didn't want them to - we can choose.
A really great thing happens... to someone else - we can choose.
The world comes crashing down as we know it- we can choose.

That's the thing about choices.  They are ours. 

Jesus came to give us life more abundant - life to the full.  A life of blessings. And we can have it - if we choose.

I hope you choose well <3

Christa 


"Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live!"  Deut. 30:19

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10

He knows my name.

Seven months ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer. 

No warning. No insurance. And no money to pay for it all. 

I felt scared, lonely and weak.

 But He knew my name.

Today I went for my surgery post op appointment. I am healing well. My tumor had shrunk to the degree that it wasn't detected on a mammogram and looked like scar tissue. She removed it and it's GONE! Another part of the process is done. 

I felt stronger and more like myself when I woke up this morning. A little stronger every day. 

Going through struggles and tough times can bring out the worst in us. Things we thought we had overcome - come out of hiding places and show their ugly faces. 

But nothing happens that God isn't aware of- that He doesn't allow... So it's all for His glory. The pain, suffering, the ugly. To make us more like Him- and to strengthen our faith. And I have learned that this is truer than true- that God loves ugly. He embraces it. At my worst, at my ugliest point- he loved me. He knew my name. And I was enough. 

Though I am not thankful for cancer- I am thankful for this season. I have learned so much about myself. I have learned that I am tougher than I had believed. And that I have a savior that accepts me and everything about me. 

He knows my name, but He calls me beloved. Even when we are unloveable, ungrateful, and ugly. Today I'm so grateful for life. I get to laugh with my husband, play cards with my babies, enjoy time with people I love, serve in ministry. My heart is so full. 

And I'm determined in my heart that I won't take life for granted. I want to soak up every opportunity, forgive those who hurt me, and love well. Love Jesus and people with all of my heart. 

Because what else really matters?

Won't you join me? ❤️

Christa 

Don't wanna miss a thing.

Hello friends :)

It's been a while.

Being sick is an ugly beast.  It's not something you can really explain. The feelings and emotions are so up and down.

One minute I feel like positive polly, and the next I'm down in the dumps.  Oh hormones and chemo and ugh.

As a believer, we are supposed to be full of faith and belief- that He will carry us through and heal us and take care of us.  (and I so very much believe that)

Oh but we are are so very human. So fragile and small.  I am more aware of this than I ever have been.

Watch your judgement.... You really see how strong your faith is when you face something like this.

I remember the first time I held each of my babies.

Touching their skin, putting my finger inside their tiny hand, the feeling of them wrapping their fingers around mine.  Aware of how tiny and breakable they were, and without our care they couldn't survive.

I have felt the brevity of that during this time. Not only with my health, but with relationships too. I have realized that it is "hard" for others to see me as sick. I began to feel the distance from those I thought wouldn't pull away.

At first this offended me.  I'm still the same person- the same friend- with the same heart.  But I guess it would be hard for me to see someone I care about be sick too.  Growing in my "grace with others" area, and trusting that He puts who I, We need in our lives when we need them. And we all have our limits I suppose.  I'm sure there have been many times I have missed the mark.

It has been particularly hard on my husband and children.  Which was expected.  But I know it is strengthening us in areas too.  I will be so glad when it is over- but we are not promised tomorrow are we?  All I have been thinking is - "can't wait to get back to my normal life."  But what is normal?

So for now- I am trying to make the most of the moments.  What I used to consider mundane and unimportant and whatever.

Fixing my daughter's hair.

Folding my husband's laundry.

Attending my son's football practice.

Packing their lunches.

Signing their permission forms.

Kissing them goodnight.

Because I don't wanna miss a thing.

I have to miss church, and parties, and activities with my children.  I try to drag myself out whenever physically possible- because being alone in bed sick is the pits. LOL

One treatment left, then surgery, then 6 weeks of radiation. Just enough to steal my summer- but I will make the most of the moments I can.  And pray that I look back on this time as a horrible season and shut the door tight.  

Thank you for your love- support- prayers.  It means more to me that I can say and it will be remembered.  Reach out to someone today.  Love does.

Much love <3
christa

This little light

This little light of mine, 

I'm gonna let it shine

This little light of mine

I'm gonna let it shine

This little light of mine

I'm gonna let it shine

Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine. 

Most of us have heard this sweet little song at church when we were little, and know it by heart. I have often told my kids when leaving for school, "shine your light today." 

There are so many in need of the light. In desperate need of hope, the belief that things can and will get better. 

Many drench their pillows with tears and cries for relief at night. We are human, and we grow weary. This is why we must let our lights shine. 

Last night I wept and had a heart full of questions and doubts. Do you really see? I know you are the God who sees. But do you really see, or hear? Do you really care, God? 

Today I came home to a box at my front door, full of sweet thoughtful gifts. From beautiful sisters that I have never met face to face. Instagram friends from several different states. With scripture and encouragement that was His perfect time.

A token of love. 

How He loves us, friends. 

I sit here overwhelmed by His love. His amazing love. That wraps us up and fills our gaps and is always, always enough. 

Don't take your light for granted. Let it shine. We all have dark times, and a little light is sometimes all we need to pull ourselves up by the bootstraps and go another day. 

He sees, He hears, He cares. 

Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore;you are of more value than many sparrows. Matthew 10:29-31

❤️let it shine,

Christa 

I wore a wig today.

I wore a wig today. It was weird. 

I went to walmart and everyone stared and pointed. 

Ok not really. But it felt like it :) 

I think I am a pretty real person. What you see is what you get.

Same person behind closed doors that I am anywhere else.

I really have a hard time with lies. Being betrayed is a tough one for me to get over. Forgive? Yes. 

Trust again, not so easy. 

A wig feels like a lie. Like I'm pretending to be something I'm not. Just odd. 

Some people might do the wig thing and it works great. Good for them. We each have to find our thing. And I might wear one every one in a while. 

Being bald is odd too, but hey, it's who I am right now. 

And that's ok. 

❤️ Christa 

Be still

"Be still my heart and know,

You are God alone

Stop thinking so much

And just let go.

Be still my soul and rest,

Humbly I confess 

That in my weakness

Your strength is perfect.

For you alone are God

There will be no other

And you have won my heart

More than any other

So I will give it all 

Cause you gave it all for me

Bless The Lord, oh 

My soul cries out

All that is within me praise"

Be Still, Steffany Frizzell Gretzenger 

Why is it so hard to let go? We so badly want control. Control of our lives, the people we are connected to, control of what happens to us and how and when... But we just can't. 

Sooner or later it becomes overwhelming and we get to the point where we realize we don't have the answers. And we definitely don't have control. 

That moment when we realize our hands are gripped tight - and when we open them they are filled with nothing. 

There is a mountain in front of me- cancer- and as much as I look for a way around it- there is none. And believe me, I have looked...(Oh flesh, why can't you just obey?)  I must cross over- He has prepared us for our mountain. I remind myself daily- I can do this- choose joy. 

Sometimes He calls us to walk through the valley...oh but we don't want to. It's hard there. It's lonely there. It's weary and tough and there we are vulnerable. But in my weakness, Your strength is perfect. 

Jesus...He has equipped us along our journey- the things we have come out of have strengthened us-and there is always enough because He died. You can do it. 

Do it afraid, but do it. 

Much love, 

Christa 

I'm not brave.

There. I said it. 

I am not brave. Actually, I'm afraid. 

What? She's afraid? Yes I am. Terrified at times. 

I am not brave on my own. 

When I was little, I remember being afraid of the dark. 

I would imagine all sorts of things scurrying around on the floor, under my bed, in the closet. 

Things I couldn't see or predict or control. 

When will I learn that life is not predictable? That I just can't make sense of things that come my way?

My humanness craves predictability and routine. Comfort. My mind says that if I can just make sense of things- then somehow things are okay. 

We say things like- "things happen for a reason"- and "it's part of His plan"- etc. 

what if the only reason is for His glory? 

The promise isn't that we wouldn't go through things- the promise is that we wouldn't walk alone. 

As people watch me walk this journey- a concern has been heavy on my heart. That I have the appearance as strong. Unafraid. Brave. Unrealistic. 

I just want to clarify- I am going through something awful and scary and hard. It's not fun. I have to choose joy- peace- hope- every single day. Every hour. And without the presence of Jesus in my heart and life I would have already lost my mind. Not even kidding. 

I'm a scared little girl with a measure of faith that is being tested and I will grow in this process. Isn't that what having courage is really about? Being afraid but doing it anyway? 

Some feel fear and stop in their tracks. Pull the covers over their heads and hide. 

Then there are those of us who choose to take a deep breath- kick fear in the teeth and turn on the light. 

Because just like the Samaritan woman at the well- john 4- he meets us where we are. In our shame, our fear and our humanness. That's who He is. The present God- with us and beside us and hand in hand with us. He seeks us out. 

                    "Give me a drink..." John 4:7

Whatever you're facing, do it afraid. He's with you. 

Much love,

Christa ❤️

Bear one anothers' burdens

Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2

I just want to take a moment to say how thankful I am to all of you. 

Thankful for your words.

Thankful for your encouragement.

Thankful for your prayers and thoughts and tears. 

Thankful for it all.  

Until you are on this side of something like this- you just don't know how much of a difference it all makes.  I can't even express my appreciation - there aren't any words.  

We are called to lift one another up - I believe this is not only a calling from scripture- but a duty of the human race - to react when we know another is hurting, to DO something, whatever that looks like.  

Sometimes it's forgiveness. Letting go. Because this stuff sure makes you see what is REALLY important. 

And sometimes it is a quiet prayer with a pure heart- and God sees that too.  

Thank you for reacting- in whatever way.  

Are some reactions tough to take? Sure.  Are some awkward in their response? LOL  sure they are. Because some things we just don't know what to say. Or do. And I get that.    

Because we know there just aren't any words sometimes that are sufficient.  

But- it's the posture of the heart that counts.  And that is what God sees.  

So thank you.  Love does.  And love isn't love until you give it away.  There are so many that are thirsty for love- seek them out today.  Stop for the one today. Everyone has tough days- weeks-months-years...

 One day you just might be the one in need of that love.  You reap what you sow.

I have prayed for others many times- have been the one on the other side  - and now I appreciate it so much more.  

He is the God who doesn't just take away our suffering. But He is the God who enters into it.

Much love <3 
Christa 

Asking for your prayers.

I have prayed and thought and prayed and thought about doing this blog.
I really feel that this is the easiest way to get communication out to a large group of people.

I know many of you have been praying for me, and have been asking if I'm okay. I appreciate your love and concern more than you know. We haven't said anything until now because we just weren't sure.

 There's just no easy way to share this...

I have been diagnosed with breast cancer.  I have a good prognosis- it is "early stage" and the doctors feel it has been discovered at the best time.

I just wasn't feeling "myself" for a few months now....hormones, as well as a lump I discovered in October.

I am still coming to terms with all of this - it has been challenging to say the least - but my faith in God is not shaken.  I believe that He will work all things together for my good- and those affected- and that He will get glory from this.

I pray that you won't feel hurt if I haven't shared this with you "face to face"... it is a difficult thing to share. I appreciate your understanding.  The support system He has given is so precious to us.

It will be a long process- but I'm a fighter, and refuse to be broken.

I pray that my little life will shine for Him through the process.  No matter what it looks like.

I ask you to pray and believe with me for complete healing and for my family to be covered with His mercy and love and peace.  Thank you in advance.

I love you and am thankful for those God has blessed me to be in relationship with.

Count your blessings, name them one by one :)

<3 Christa

He knew

Hey friends. 

Have had a Misty Edwards song in my heart for a few days now. 

"I knew what I was getting into when called you.

I knew what I was getting into when I said your name, but I said it just the same.
I knew what I was getting into and I still want you.
I knew what I was getting into.

I knew what I was getting into and I still chose you.
I knew what I was getting into and I still want you.
I knew what I was getting into when I said your name, but I said it just the same.
I knew what I was getting into.

And I am not shocked by your weakness.
And I am not shocked even by your sin.
And I am not shocked by your brokenness."

My prayer is and has been, "whatever it looks like." I want Him to be glorified in me. But when life hits you and you didn't expect it- the prayer is harder to stay submitted to. It gets harder - and harder - to walk your path- it was carved out just for you. It gets harder to trust- does He really see? Is He turning a deaf ear? It gets harder to hear- and know- that He's walking right beside you- holding your hand. He's in the waiting- and He's not shocked by our questions and doubts. 

He can handle it. 

Isn't that so wonderful? He's not mad or shocked or disappointed that we question our situation- He just wants us to learn and grow and lean. He knew what He was getting into. And we aren't "too much" for Him. He can handle all of our hurts and doubts and past. And He is more than able to carry us. 

Remember that today friends. And remember He still answers prayers. Believe it.

❤️ Christa 

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=kIAPM46dYPY&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DkIAPM46dYPY