He knows my name.

Seven months ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer. 

No warning. No insurance. And no money to pay for it all. 

I felt scared, lonely and weak.

 But He knew my name.

Today I went for my surgery post op appointment. I am healing well. My tumor had shrunk to the degree that it wasn't detected on a mammogram and looked like scar tissue. She removed it and it's GONE! Another part of the process is done. 

I felt stronger and more like myself when I woke up this morning. A little stronger every day. 

Going through struggles and tough times can bring out the worst in us. Things we thought we had overcome - come out of hiding places and show their ugly faces. 

But nothing happens that God isn't aware of- that He doesn't allow... So it's all for His glory. The pain, suffering, the ugly. To make us more like Him- and to strengthen our faith. And I have learned that this is truer than true- that God loves ugly. He embraces it. At my worst, at my ugliest point- he loved me. He knew my name. And I was enough. 

Though I am not thankful for cancer- I am thankful for this season. I have learned so much about myself. I have learned that I am tougher than I had believed. And that I have a savior that accepts me and everything about me. 

He knows my name, but He calls me beloved. Even when we are unloveable, ungrateful, and ugly. Today I'm so grateful for life. I get to laugh with my husband, play cards with my babies, enjoy time with people I love, serve in ministry. My heart is so full. 

And I'm determined in my heart that I won't take life for granted. I want to soak up every opportunity, forgive those who hurt me, and love well. Love Jesus and people with all of my heart. 

Because what else really matters?

Won't you join me? ❤️

Christa