Things I'd tell my newlywed self.

Oh hey self. 

You're looking pretty excited and scared and in love. 

Hard times will come, good times will come, and I need you to listen. 

Your eyes light up when he's around and butterflies when you talk about him and when you talk about your future. Remember this. 

The days with pagers instead of cell phones and the late night "143"... Remember this. 

Walking down the aisle and being shaky and hopeful and hearing George Straight singing and saying "I do..." Remember this. 

When the first baby comes (and the second and third...) and you see how much they look like you and him, and you see what a miracle God made, and that he used you both... The feeling doesn't have words. Remember this. 

When the fights come and go... And come again... And he wraps his arms around you and wipes your tears away... The times he cries with you... Remember this. 

When the first house is built... And he works so hard to build a life for your family... Countless hours at his job and lonely times for you both, but with a goal in mind... Remember this. 

When the lump is found, and you tell him... He held you and prayed with you and wiped your tears. When the diagnosis comes he stands with you and though his knees buckle at times, he stays and helps carry the burden. Remember this. 

When people come and go, and life takes you to new places, the love grows and it doesn't leave. He teaches you about love and what it really looks like, and it's not only a feeling. It's a choice. A decision. Remember this. 

Love isn't earned - it's given. Because we were saved by love that hung on a cross. It wasn't earned, it was freely given. 

Remember this. 

Don't give up on love. If it's broken, fix it. If it's dry, water it. If it's hard, pray through it. 

Remember this.

Love, 

Your future self 

Sometimes we miss it.

Sometimes we miss it. As Christians. 

We are called to be light and salt. Ambassadors of love. And some of us really try. But we just are short some days. 

Some of us discount people...there's always more to a person than what meets the eye. Look again. 

Some shoot their wounded instead of binding their wounds. Or casting them off- afraid of getting dirty.  In the name of Jesus... Not really understanding that one. 

My family has entered a new season. It's different from any other season we've been in, and we've had to take a lot of hits to the heart. 

The pain and hurt from some has been countered with love and compassion from others. 

But we have not kept pushing forward without being pressed on every side. 

We have had to set our gaze and determine in our hearts that Jesus is better- better than any persons approval. Better than a microphone or recognition. 

Better than being seen by man. 

This is not easy or simple. It's a daily choice. To be content in the season. 

Knowing Jesus and letting everything that prevents us from seeing Him be burnt away. 

Christians are gonna miss it sometimes- myself included. And when that happens, let's not pretend we didn't. Fake it. Be self righteous and make excuses. 

And if you've been hurt by Christians- I'm sorry. I'm sorry and I pray you'll remember we are just humans and most of us are really trying. The enemy gets the best of all of us some days. 

Please don't give up on God and his plans for you. 

Let's forgive and get it right the next time. Grow in love and grace. 

Let's learn to love. He's watching ❤️